Spicy parsnip and apple soup.

So... after all the promises to post my soup recipe last time, it has been a while since I posted. This is partly due to feeling really down last week, and partly down to being really unwell. Winter always comes with colds and sore throats... lets hope I get this out of my system before Christmas!!

Its crazy that it is already the second day of advent. Christmas can be a funny time of year when struggling with depression. I found it really hard last year, made worse by having the flu! Sometimes all the people you love can be in the same room but you can still feel completely alone and separate from reality. It can be made even worse when everyone around you is joyful and happy, and you just cant bring yourself to feel the same way. I was also struggling a lot more with my eating problems last Christmas... so the season of eating really really scared me. I was terrified of Christmas day and all the food. Last year I spent my first Christmas away from my family and spent it with my partners family. I am so glad I did. I was nervous and scared and so worried about being away from my Mum. But I felt loved and included and that I was spending Christmas with my surrogate family!!

I keep getting the same fears about Christmas as I did last year, but at the moment it doesn't seem as strong. This time I can see the parts I will love, and I am looking forward to being surrounded by family and friends. At the moment I am just trying to fight away that demon in my head telling me I will feel alone and I will be so unhappy. I am going to try to let the good bits happen and not worry about the next day. I know... easier said than done!

Anyway, enough about Christmas. There's still a few weeks to go yet!

Here is the promised recipe from last time! Sorry it took so long!! It is another recipe that can be made when feeling OK and then can be kept for a later date. I made it at lunch time when I was feeling OK and then reheated it that night for tea. We also kept it in the fridge and had it 2 days later, and currently we have a stash in the freezer too!! It should keep for a few months in the freezer.

Spicy parsnip and apple soup.
Serves 6-8

900g  parsnips (chopped, peel left on)

3 bramley apples (pealed, cored, chopped)

2 large onions (chopped)

2 large cloves garlic (crushed)

1 heaped tsp: ground corriander

                     ground cumin

                     tumeric

                     ground ginger

                     smoked paprika

1/2 tsp mustard seeds

1.2L vegetable stock

5 tbsp low fat cream cheese

salt and pepper

When I have chopped the parsnips and apples, I put them straight into a bowl of cold water to prevent any browning. 

Heat the mustard seeds in a large dry pan until they start to pop. Add the onions and garlic with some olive oil and cook on a low heat until the onions are soft (5-10 mins). Add the rest of the spices, the parsnips, apples and the stock. Bring to the boil and then turn the heat down to simmer gently for 40 mins-1 hour, until the parsnips are soft. 

Remove from the heat and blend until smooth. Stir in the cream cheese until melted and combined with the soup. Season with salt and pepper to your preferred taste. 

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So... soup again for tea!! This time pea, mint and apple. I will hopefully post the recipe in the week... if it tastes nice! I am notorious for making up recipes, but up to now most of them have worked!!! I honestly live off more than soup... although at the moment it seems as though I am a soup fiend!!! 

Take care. Lots of love xxx

Just a little one...

Just thought I would write a short post as it has been a few days now.

I had a really nice weekend with family and friends. It has been a while since I felt confident enough to see friends, even though I knew they would be understanding if I told them what had been going on. But it's not something you bring up in conversation over drinks. And I am quite private about who I do and don't tell. I suppose I am scared about how people will react and still feel like they will think I am a failure and have brought this on myself. It is so nice that so far, the people I have told are really understanding and supportive. More so than I could have hoped for.

I went back to my home city and it was really nice to to relax with my brothers and have nice food made for me for a change! My brother made lovely home made lasagne, and although I am not a pasta lover, this was gorgeous.

My partner and I were also treated to lunch with his Mum and Dad at TGI Friday. It was my first time there, so I have broken my TGIF virginity! And I was surprised at how nice it was... and how very american!!

It is sometimes really hard after having a weekend surrounded by people you love, on Monday morning it feels like a massive come down. In fact it felt like that on the train home, even though I was with my partner... and even though he is so supportive and loving, sometimes I can't help but feel alone. This has been made worse by the fact I am not feeling very well, and the weather here today is a bit miserable.

It is really lonely when my partner goes to work on Monday morning...  but today I am going to force myself to brave the cold and buy ingredients for spicy parsnip and apple soup. I made this for the first time last weekend, and it was so comforting. I am hoping it will also help the sore throat! I will post a picture and recipe once I have made it later. And... at some point this week I promise to post the bagel recipe!!!

Take care and lots of love xxx

Goats cheese frittata.

So.... what a week. It has been a bit of a roller coaster of ups and downs and days where I just felt numb. I have been going through the motions a little bit, just forcing myself to get up and dressed some days. And usually turning to a glass of wine in the evening before going to sleep.

But some days I have managed to make bagels (which we have instead of bread), and I am slowly perfecting the technique and cooking times. I will post this recipe at a later date, when I am satisfied with it. I am finding bread making really therapeutic, especially the kneading and watching it double in size! And there is of course the added bonus of freshly baked bread with butter... YUM!!

This week we have been finishing off homemade soups which were frozen or made last weekend. Unfortunately I have not taken photos and couldn't bring myself to write my blog... I will post the soup recipes next time I make them. However, last night... in an attempt to get a bit more protein in the diet with relatively little effort.. I made frittata. I love making this as you can pretty much put what you want in, and last night I used anything I could find in the fridge or freezer... and it turned out really well! So I thought I would share the recipe here. The fresh Thyme I used was actually frozen... I use it in a few soup recipes so leaving it in the freezer saves money.

I am going to post photos whenever I can, so instead of listing a load of tried and tested recipes I will post them as and when I make them. And of course that depends on how I am feeling.

Anyway! Here is the next recipe...

Goats Cheese Frittata
Serves 4

6 large eggs
4 tbsp milk
1 large onion (diced)
1/2 tsp ground cumin
2 cloves garlic (crushed)
1 tbsp fresh thyme leaved (chopped)
1 tbsp dried parsley
half punnet cherry tomatoes (cut into halves)
3 handfuls frozen peas
100g goats cheese
salt and pepper

Heat the oven to 180'c (fan assisted).
Cook the onion, garlic, thyme and parsley in an oven proof frying pan until the onions are soft.

Add the tomatoes and peas and cook for 5 minutes. During this time beat the eggs, milk, cumin, salt and pepper together (I used about 1 tsp salt and 2 tsp pepper).

Pour the egg mix over the the pan mixture and cook on the lowest heat possible on the hob until the mix is begining to set, but is still a bit runny on top (takes about 10 mins).

Scatter the goats cheese on top and place in the oven on the top shelf until the mixture is set and has risen in the pan (5-15 minutes depending on how wet the mix was). Remove from the oven and allow to rest for a couple of minutes before cutting and serving. I usually serve it with salad and bread.

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Simples!!! It saves in the fridge for the following day and is lovely cold or reheated in the microwave. So it's frittata for tea again tonight... but I don't mind ;)

I hope you give this a go! I will post some more frittata recipes in the near future but they are so simple you can pretty much add anything (although be careful if the ingredients are too wet as it may not set).

So... today's bagels have been proving and are ready to shape. Off I go... if they work out nicely I will post the recipe later with a picture.

Take care of yourself. Lots of love xxx

Leek and potato soup.

This has always been a favorite of my Mum's and it is really nice comfort food with the benefit of actually being quite healthy! Perfect for cold dark nights.
This soup has very few ingredients and little washing up afterwards! Bonus! Ingredients can be bought in advance for cooking at a later date or whenever you feel up to it. It can also be refrigerated and reheated for the next two days or frozen for future non-cooking nights. I serve it with chunky bread and butter.

Leek and potato soup.

1 large onion, diced
3 large baking potatoes, peeled and cubed
2 large leeks
1.2 L vegetable or chicken stock
1/2 tsp ground cumin
150 ml double cream
salt and pepper

Cook the onion with olive oil in a deep pan/ casserole dish for a few minutes. Add the leeks and cook until the onions and leeks are soft (5-10 minutes).
Add the potatoes and cumin then pour over the vegetable stock and give it a good stir. Bring to a simmer and cook for 20-30 minutes on the hob with the lid on, until the potatoes are starting to fall apart. Stir in the cream and add salt and freshly ground pepper to your own taste.

And that's it!! You could experiment and add other spices and herbs, but I love the simplicity of this soup.

Hope you enjoy! Lots of love xxx